The Fingolstones Firemen
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Picture
Dobba   - Guitar
Norbert – Vocals


The Woody song is actually quite a cruel ditty. It is about a young lady called Angela Priest, who at the time had a snogging action something akin to a Woodpecker going hammer and tongs at a tree. She was also quite plump (I must add at this point that she is not so anymore).

The inspiration for the Woody song was Angela’s relationship with the young Andy Farnsworth. Unfortunately this was to come to a premature end when she threw half a lager over him at the Conservative Club disco one night. A hilarious sight to behold by all that were present.

The Woody song is also famous as being the great unfinished Fingolstones song. Technical problems plagued it all the way. Norbert’s vocals were always too far ahead of Dobbas frenetic guitar playing and the song had to be stopped and restarted on numerous occasions. Once the vocal was sorted the real problems began. The specially made plectrums carved from the finest plastic that Dobba used proved to be no match for the furious strumming that this tune required. One by one they snapped and were cast aside. Eventually a 2 pence piece was used but this ended up breaking the guitar strings. As a result the song was never finished and no one ever did find out what happened to the Woodpecker girl.


Picture
This girl has got a bum that sticks out a mile
This girl has got lips that try and form a smile
She opens up her mouth, holds you deep down inside
She holds you tight, she opens it wide

(Chorus)
Back and forth, back and forth
Watch her head go
Back and forth, back and forth
She's got you now and there's nowhere to go

When this girl is around you'd better watch out
If she comes near you, stand still and say nowt
A little peck is all she wants from you
If your not careful boy she'll suck the life from you

(Chorus)

This Woodpecker Girl won the love of a man
The mental scars he has to this day
The moral of my tale is easy to tell
When she is around pretend that your gay

PROJECT ABANDONED. 




Picture
The Woodpecker Girl has a message for Andy which also graphically illustrates her unfeasibly large hand.

Picture
The real "Woody"

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